Your Body Belongs to Her; Her Body Belongs to You
Among believers, one of the misunderstood, misapplied and under practiced teachings of the Bible is sex between husband and wife. Pastor Bob Deffinbaugh presents an exhaustive study in his article, “Sex and the Spiritual Christian, 1 Corinthians 7:1-7” (Bible.org, 2004). Beginning with attitudes of certain groups regarding sex among the Corinthians that are still prevalent in our day, Deffinbaugh discusses the origins of the idea that sex is dirty – even for married people. Along with that mindset was (and is) the belief that the wife is to please her husband sexually, but the husband has no responsibility to please his wife.
Paul sets the record straight for all time in 1 Corinthians 7:2-4:
“Let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.” These verses stress the mutuality of sexual pleasure and sexual duty.
The pleasure principle of sex between married couples is found in the Old Testament as well. In Proverbs 5:15-19, we find a beautiful, poetic passage from the wise King Solomon:
“Drink water from your own cistern, And fresh water from your own well. Should your springs be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets? Let them be yours alone, And not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice in the wife of your youth. As a loving hind and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; Be exhilarated always with her love.”
Brothers, Spirit-filled, satisfying sex is possible when there is mutual submission. Paul’s message to the Ephesians makes this very clear. In chapter 5, he gives godly instructions for Christian living – and brings it home from verses 21-33. Married believers should submit to one another out of reverence for Christ; wives must submit to their husbands out of love for Christ; husbands must love their wives as Christ loves the Church – which means they must love their wives as they love their own bodies! A woman who is being loved and cherished in this way will not likely have a problem “submitting”. And a man who is being respected by his wife will not tire of finding ways to please his wife, in and out of bed.
It is a brilliant plan for successful unions. And wholly holy.
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