As promised, some "stick-like-glue" agreements:
- AGREE: that times will not always be easy. And agree that when you fight you'll make sure there's a beginning and an end. Think of disagreements in terms of a container. A container has limits and at times must be closed and reopened at another agreed-upon date. Don't let a container's contents spill over into all areas of your relationship. You will not always see eye to eye. Sometimes you must respectfully agree to disagree. But make sure you also spend time talking about things that you do view similarly. Avoid staying in a battle - and never keep score. Marriage is not a competition. It's a commitment.
3. ANTICIPATE: that things won't always go your way. Look for signs and triggers that indicate all is not well. Is your spouse withdrawn? Does he or she seem irritated by the fact that you're in the room? Do you continually interrupt when your spouse is speaking? Do you look for ways to debate or prove your mate wrong? Are you thinking of your response before your spouse finishes speaking?
Drop the hostage and project mentalities. A wife doesn't want to be held hostage by her husband. And a husband will never be a project that can be fixed. Expect that there will be conflicts, passion, disagreements, and decisions made - sometimes in the same night. Be willing to talk about them, and refuse to harbor them for days, weeks, or months.
Tony Rankin says, Couples like Derek and Kelli continue to learn each day that marriage is not a fight - but it's worth fighting for. Their relationship is a testimony of God's original plan for marriage: honest, open, sacrificial love as a way of life . Is yours?
As we move forward in this series, we welcome your comments and marital tips that work for you, so that all of us may be edified. It's all about FIGHTING FOR OUR MARRIAGES!
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