The Year of Magical Thinking, by Joan Didion

I thought it fitting that, at 3:39 a.m. PST, I should take time to write something current. A break from my obsessive, albeit nostalgic, ransacking of my poetry archives, posting away as if the old "hope chest" really holds some gems. (My muse is back, but I'm letting his promptings marinate till the time is write- misspelled purposely)

If you haven't read it, I urge you to get a copy of Joan Didion's magical account of her life and its abrupt change when her husband, writer, John Gregory Dunne, passed away...She chronicles a year and a day, in amazingly wonderful word pictures, that I believe is important to all of us. As humans, one thing is certain once we survive the birth canal - we'll die one day. The book is not morbid by any means. An accomplished writer herself, Ms. Didion manages to edify, entertain, and engage the reader at once; so much so it's hard to tear oneself away.

I was given the CD (4 in the case) as a gift by my parents, last year - a few months after the sudden death of my husband. I wasn't ready to hear it at that time. My heart was still too tender, and from what I heard of the first two chapters - the author's experience mirrored my own, down to emotions, thoughts (verbatim, mind you!), and of course, the questions. But I knew I'd find my way back to it in the fullness of time. And when I tell you that I devoured those CDs, please believe me! I became so engrossed by the details, the literary references (Ms. Didion is an exquisite literary source and drove me to "Google" and other resources that enabled me to thoroughly appreciate the nuances and augment the contexts). I had a field day discovering quotes from plays, movies and books I haven't seen or read (that are now on my "must have" list), and philosophers, psychologists...all from the extensive research Didion immersed herself in while going through the grieving process. Her book was a source of confirmation and yet another conduit through which I am now realizing my own heart's healing. (and I thought I was doing pretty well through my spiritual convictions and Faith). "The Year of Magical Thinking" accelerated my progress.

I shall now get the hard copy...and read it cover to cover. I shall savor it, turning the pages as I anticipate the morsels of wisdom born of rich life experiences; the good, bad and horrific.  And I am moved to gather up my notes to myself, and put them in order to chronicle my own passage from married 31 years to widow, suddenly, when things were going so well and life was high in the clouds. Ms. Didion inspired me, lit a fire in my soul. I can say of a surety that I have lived a MIRACLE year from the day my husband died, May 8, 2010, to this day...strange as that may seem. It's nothing but the truth.