I've been thinking about friends and loved ones who have passed away over the past 5 years. Starting with my sweet maternal grandmother and a beautiful aunt in 2009; my college sweetheart/first husband in 2010; a dear coworker and sister/friend in 2011; and another precious, longtime sister/friend in 2012. As I was reminiscing, my thoughts brought me to the final conversations I had with each of them; conversations we did not know would be our last. In each case, our hearts were knit together so tightly in laughter, in prayer and joy - and our words were loving toward one another!
As I see so many among my friends whose loved ones are dying, and hearts that are torn apart because of grief, I just wish to encourage and remind all of us to pay attention to how we speak to one another. Life.Is.Short. And we don't get the time back to do it over.
I am thankful that, concerning my dearly departed loved ones, I have no regrets . My prayer is that I am ever mindful of the way I treat the living. We've heard the saying "Give me my flowers while I can smell them," - that's a great practice. Love words are important; beautiful to give and receive. And the memory of those last words can bring the comfort and peace to help us through the sadness long after our loved ones are gone.
Tuesday, December 30, 2014
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Wherever You Go, There YOU Are...
This is for those people who are blind to their own frailties and take their toxic behaviors into every relationship, work environment, church affiliation, etc., and experience the exact same problems and drama as before.
A friend recently told me that a group of individuals left the church fellowship (where I had been a member before moving away) and are now attending another group. They are studying their Hebraic roots, learning Hebrew, the Torah, the Tanakh, the Feast Days, etc. They have also come into the knowledge of the name of our Lord as He was called when He walked the earth, and the name of the Father. The Son was not known as Jesus - a historical fact of which I'll not go into at this time (but it is searchable). His proper name is Yahshua. The name of the Father is Yahweh, presented as YHWH. And when I was told this, I was fine with it, as I've done my own homework on the Hebrew and Aramaic roots of my faith. I said, "Ok. Great. They're gaining more knowledge. Nothing wrong with that."
However, the issue is - these people are behaving badly, as if they are now superior in knowledge to the "uninformed" Christians of their former church fellowship. And it is downright mean. As my friend was describing conversations with these folks, who were just months ago friends and fellow laborers for Christ, I realized something. These very same people had once been of other faiths/denominations, or none at all, and when they converted to what they (then) believed was the Truth, they grew arrogant and elevated themselves above those of their former associations/denominations. They had bragged about their new-found beliefs to their friends and family, and came close to condemning them all to hell if they didn't get on board THIS train!
Now, they've gained more information. But many of them are still arrogant and unloving as they study with the Rabbis and learn of the Messianic Faith System. This behavior is completely opposite of what Yahshua/Jesus teaches - and all their "knowledge" does them no good in the long run. They clearly have not been transformed in their minds and hearts, and have no love for their neighbors.
So they have hopped from church to church to doctrine to teaching to Feast Days from Sunday to Sabbath to saying "Shabbat Shalom!" - from first day to seventh day - yet they remain the same on the inside.Without His love in their hearts, they are just spouting religious teachings with no power to display the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22).
I told my friend that we have one response and responsibility: to pray for and love them, anyway.
Shalom!
A friend recently told me that a group of individuals left the church fellowship (where I had been a member before moving away) and are now attending another group. They are studying their Hebraic roots, learning Hebrew, the Torah, the Tanakh, the Feast Days, etc. They have also come into the knowledge of the name of our Lord as He was called when He walked the earth, and the name of the Father. The Son was not known as Jesus - a historical fact of which I'll not go into at this time (but it is searchable). His proper name is Yahshua. The name of the Father is Yahweh, presented as YHWH. And when I was told this, I was fine with it, as I've done my own homework on the Hebrew and Aramaic roots of my faith. I said, "Ok. Great. They're gaining more knowledge. Nothing wrong with that."
However, the issue is - these people are behaving badly, as if they are now superior in knowledge to the "uninformed" Christians of their former church fellowship. And it is downright mean. As my friend was describing conversations with these folks, who were just months ago friends and fellow laborers for Christ, I realized something. These very same people had once been of other faiths/denominations, or none at all, and when they converted to what they (then) believed was the Truth, they grew arrogant and elevated themselves above those of their former associations/denominations. They had bragged about their new-found beliefs to their friends and family, and came close to condemning them all to hell if they didn't get on board THIS train!
Now, they've gained more information. But many of them are still arrogant and unloving as they study with the Rabbis and learn of the Messianic Faith System. This behavior is completely opposite of what Yahshua/Jesus teaches - and all their "knowledge" does them no good in the long run. They clearly have not been transformed in their minds and hearts, and have no love for their neighbors.
So they have hopped from church to church to doctrine to teaching to Feast Days from Sunday to Sabbath to saying "Shabbat Shalom!" - from first day to seventh day - yet they remain the same on the inside.Without His love in their hearts, they are just spouting religious teachings with no power to display the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22).
I told my friend that we have one response and responsibility: to pray for and love them, anyway.
Shalom!
Wednesday, December 24, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - Upcoming Topics
Boaz Ministries
As we end the year 2014 and begin a new year, Bruce and I want to thank you for stopping by throughout the months. We've gleaned so much from readers and friends, and are blessed by your insights and encouragement.
Starting January 1, 2015, we will resume "The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage". The topics will cover Anger, Rudeness, Abuse, Forgiveness Issues, Depression, Negative Emotions, Issues with Children, Finances, Addictions and Other Destructive Behaviors, Outside Influences that Pollute Your Sexual Relationship, Hardness of Heart (causing love to die), and If/When the "D" Word Becomes an Option.
At the outset of this series, we promised to go all the way in, exploring the deeper things couples face in marriage. Communication breakdown is usually the gateway to most marital troubles. Tackling that issue first, refusing to let it get a toehold by praying through difficulties we may have expressing ourselves openly to one another, will create an environment where the other poisonous relationship traps and distractions cannot survive.
Continue to pray for each other, TOGETHER, beloved. And love one another fiercely!
Blessings,
B&B
As we end the year 2014 and begin a new year, Bruce and I want to thank you for stopping by throughout the months. We've gleaned so much from readers and friends, and are blessed by your insights and encouragement.
Starting January 1, 2015, we will resume "The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage". The topics will cover Anger, Rudeness, Abuse, Forgiveness Issues, Depression, Negative Emotions, Issues with Children, Finances, Addictions and Other Destructive Behaviors, Outside Influences that Pollute Your Sexual Relationship, Hardness of Heart (causing love to die), and If/When the "D" Word Becomes an Option.
At the outset of this series, we promised to go all the way in, exploring the deeper things couples face in marriage. Communication breakdown is usually the gateway to most marital troubles. Tackling that issue first, refusing to let it get a toehold by praying through difficulties we may have expressing ourselves openly to one another, will create an environment where the other poisonous relationship traps and distractions cannot survive.
Continue to pray for each other, TOGETHER, beloved. And love one another fiercely!
Blessings,
B&B
A Brief Pause...Thoughts About My Dad
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| Dad and me, Father's Day, June 15, 2014 |
Dad's physical fitness and resilience have been due to his early years as an athlete, and the lifestyle changes he made in his forties. He's been my big, strong man all of my life, and I told God a couple of weeks ago that I'm not ready to be without him. I demanded a miracle that would glorify His name and give my Dad a good quality of life for the remainder of his days. But of course, His will be done (amen).
Rewind:
Dad fell at home and couldn't get up a little over two weeks ago and had to be rushed to a local hospital. They said he had pneumonia, stabilized him, and transferred him to his hospital where he is a cardiac patient. All seemed to be going well. When I spoke with him on the phone, he sounded amazingly robust - like my father of 20 years ago! It was wonderful. It was a miracle. And it was eerie.
Fast forward:
Prayers of friends and loved ones have been going up continually since he's been in the hospital. However, the doctors are stumped. His heart is doing well, but his diminishing mental capacity and inability to speak (he is mumbling as if he is speaking), are puzzling. All types of tests are being done... including the lumbar puncture and CT (he can't have an MRI due to his pacemaker).
My mother has been handling this turn of events well, praise God! And I can't say enough how grateful I am that my sister and her hubby are there - actively involved as advocates for Dad, and a comfort to Mom. I'm thankful to all my family who are in California - supporting, praying, loving. How blessed we are!
As I've said to friends and family - Dad is a soldier in the Army of the Lord. He's ministered through music all of his life, and his very own card and letter-writing ministry for the sick and shut-in. He ministered to me, above and beyond the role of a loving father, during and after the loss of my first husband, his son-in-love of 31 years. He still provides me with so much wisdom and I love our chats every Sunday. He's my biggest cheerleader and encourager - and embraced my husband, Bruce, with open arms. His 80 years on earth have been eventful, and so rich!
I don't know how to end this post, except to thank everyone for their prayers, and solicit the continued prayers of all praying folks out there - for God's will, for our strength and comfort as we endure this season.
So I told God last night that I'm sooo thankful He chose Don Winston Greathouse to be my earthly father - and even though I have my druthers, I'll just stay out of His business with my Dad. He does ALL things well, and it is well with my soul!
Thanks for reading.
Blessings
Tuesday, December 23, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - If Communication Breaks Down (part 5 of 5)
Boaz Ministries
For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is His name; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth. Isaiah 54:5
Lord, give me ears to really hear what my husband(wife) is saying so that I can bear some of his(her) burdens by simply listening. Make me quick to hear and slow to speak (James 1:19). Give me the wisdom to have a good sense of timing. I pray that "my mouth shall speak wisdom, and the meditation of my heart shall give understanding" (Psalm 49:3). May there be no division between us because we are of the same mind and have the same good judgment (1 Corinthians 1:10). Where either of us has not communicated well in the past, help us to do so now. Thank you that You are our rock and our Redeemer, and You can redeem ALL things (Psalm 78:35). Amen.
For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is His name; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth. Isaiah 54:5
Lord, give me ears to really hear what my husband(wife) is saying so that I can bear some of his(her) burdens by simply listening. Make me quick to hear and slow to speak (James 1:19). Give me the wisdom to have a good sense of timing. I pray that "my mouth shall speak wisdom, and the meditation of my heart shall give understanding" (Psalm 49:3). May there be no division between us because we are of the same mind and have the same good judgment (1 Corinthians 1:10). Where either of us has not communicated well in the past, help us to do so now. Thank you that You are our rock and our Redeemer, and You can redeem ALL things (Psalm 78:35). Amen.
Monday, December 22, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - If Communication Breaks Down (part 4 of 5)
Boaz Ministries
Husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself...and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:28,33
Lord, I pray You would open my husband's (wife's) heart to all You have for him (her) and for our marriage together. Help him (her) to know You better, to understand Your ways, and to see things from Your perspective. Help him (her) to view the two of us the way You do. Make changes in him (her) that need to be made so that nothing will hinder him (her) from fulfilling the purpose and destiny You have for his (her) life and our lives together. Lord, fill my husband's (wife's) heart with Your love so that it overflows in the words he (she) speaks. Help us to be instruments of Your peace and grace every time we speak to each other. Amen.
Husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself...and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:28,33
Lord, I pray You would open my husband's (wife's) heart to all You have for him (her) and for our marriage together. Help him (her) to know You better, to understand Your ways, and to see things from Your perspective. Help him (her) to view the two of us the way You do. Make changes in him (her) that need to be made so that nothing will hinder him (her) from fulfilling the purpose and destiny You have for his (her) life and our lives together. Lord, fill my husband's (wife's) heart with Your love so that it overflows in the words he (she) speaks. Help us to be instruments of Your peace and grace every time we speak to each other. Amen.
Sunday, December 21, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - If Communication Breaks Down (part 3 of 5)
Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way. James 3:2
Lord, I need to be changed! Reveal any times where I have not said the right words or communicated the right things to my spouse and I will confess it as a sin. For I know I fall short of Your glory (Romans 3:23). Teach me how to communicate openly and honestly so I will speak excellent, right, and truthful words (Proverbs 8:6-9). Take away any deceit in my heart and any perversity in my mind so that evil will be far from me (Proverbs 17:20). I pray that Your love will be so much in my heart that it comes out in everything I say. Give me the right words for every situation. Amen.
Saturday, December 20, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - If Communication Breaks Down (part 2 of 5)
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:13-14
Lord, teach us to listen to one another and recognize the signs in each other that give us greater understanding. Help us find things we enjoy doing together so that we will grow closer and not apart. Enable us to communicate love, appreciation and honor to each other at all times. Help us to take instant authority over any attack the enemy brings against us - especially in the area of communication. Help us to settle all disagreements between us in a loving, compromising, and considerate manner. Enable us to always be in unity with You and with each other. Amen.
Friday, December 19, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - If Communication Breaks Down (part 1 of 5)
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14
Lord, I pray You would protect my spouse and me from any kind of breakdown of communication. Enable us to always share our thoughts and feelings and refuse to be people who don't talk. Teach us to trust each other enough to share our deepest hopes, dreams, fears, and struggles with one another. Help us to spend time communicating with You every day so that our communication with each other will always be good. Teach us how to openly express love for one another, and keep us from any laziness or selfishness that would cause us to neglect to do that. Help us refuse to speak words that tear down, but only words that build up (Ephesians 4:29). Amen.
Thursday, December 18, 2014
The Power of Prayer for CHANGE in Your Marriage - Introduction
Boaz Ministries
Whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive. Matthew 21:22
In September, Boaz Ministries brought the series “More Prayer, More Power,” with selected prayers for couples from Stormie Omartian, author of A Book of Prayers for Couples. The focus in October’s presentation, “Fight for Your Marriage,” was the result of continuing observations, research and prayer.
Whether you want to protect your marriage from the damaging forces outside or within, or you desire to mend and restore your relationship where it has been broken, or you long to bring unity and peace where there has been strife, the prayers in this series can help. There is a way to pray about the deeper issues of marriage that can help you avoid them or enable you to see redemption come where a problem already exists.
When you pray powerfully for your relationship, you will see God work powerfully in it. You will see God do miracles when you pray to the God of miracles. And if you don’t give up, your faith-filled prayers can strengthen your marriage and it will last a lifetime. Experience has rewarded us with these truths.
Join us as we share the difficult topics to bring to God in prayer.
Bruce and Bridget
Whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive. Matthew 21:22
In September, Boaz Ministries brought the series “More Prayer, More Power,” with selected prayers for couples from Stormie Omartian, author of A Book of Prayers for Couples. The focus in October’s presentation, “Fight for Your Marriage,” was the result of continuing observations, research and prayer.
Whether you want to protect your marriage from the damaging forces outside or within, or you desire to mend and restore your relationship where it has been broken, or you long to bring unity and peace where there has been strife, the prayers in this series can help. There is a way to pray about the deeper issues of marriage that can help you avoid them or enable you to see redemption come where a problem already exists.
When you pray powerfully for your relationship, you will see God work powerfully in it. You will see God do miracles when you pray to the God of miracles. And if you don’t give up, your faith-filled prayers can strengthen your marriage and it will last a lifetime. Experience has rewarded us with these truths.
Join us as we share the difficult topics to bring to God in prayer.
Bruce and Bridget
Thursday, December 11, 2014
A Jolly Good Birthday for My Hubby!
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| Oxford Street |
This is a special birthday, as he is expecting his first grandchild in February, 2015! The man is on top of the world and rightfully so. We had a little birthday chat online earlier - and the smile that blossomed on his face as I sang the birthday song defies description!
My prayer for him today is that God continues to fill his heart with peace, joy and love to share with everyone along his path, for the rest of the journey!
Happy birthday, Dear One!! Blessings!
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| Big Ben and Bruce E at the River Thames! |
Sunday, December 7, 2014
Turn up the quiet
Last week was hectic and intense at work. The first week of the month is usually that way because there's a monthly report that I submit to Headquarters...due by the fifth of the month. It's the status report of all persons served by my agency, and in particular, the four facilities that send their reports to me. My site is the fifth, and I'm responsible for those stats. Easy peasy. It's only a struggle when I don't receive the documents I need in a timely manner. I compile and complete the report and it must be precise. All the numbers must add up to what's been documented in the database. The two reports must match. Any incorrect entry, variation, duplication, throws off the entire report and it's needle-in-the-haystack-time!.
When it comes to duties I enjoy the least, my goal is to expedite them as fast as I can, with accuracy. The report hasn't been late in months, it's been rushed down to Headquarters at COB on the 5th. But for the first time in the history of the P. S. Monthly Report - it was delivered last Thursday, the 4th! The language fails when I try to describe the happiness my team and I felt! My head was throbbing - but we could relax on Friday!
And Friday came. I went to work longing for quitting time so I could go back home and rest.
It had been raining all day, and the weather report said there would be rain all through Saturday. Anyone who knows me, knows that rainy days and Mondays (Tuesdays, Wednesdays...) are right up my alley! This sista couldn't wait to get home, take a long bubble bath soak, jump into my jammies, have a hot cup of tea, curl up on the couch and just vegetate blissfully! As is my custom, I sent a text message to my husband and let him know my ETA, and my plans for the evening.
Just wanted to report that when I got home, the lights were low and the only sound was Bruce playing a melody he'd composed on his bass guitar. Everything was as I had wanted...with an added treat: Bruce serenaded me with several selections while I sat on the couch with my hot tea in hand. And he surprised me by playing Amazing Grace!
It was a beautiful way to bring in Shabbat, as the showers from heaven came down.
Friday, November 28, 2014
Post Thanksgiving Day Thoughts
I was gathering my thoughts about thankfulness when Bruce gave me his post to share on our ministry page yesterday (also shared here). This is one of those things that blesses my heart - reading his thoughts, his testimony.
For Thanksgiving, I prepared my first complete meal since moving to the DC area in 2012, at my house, for my two younger adult children and my husband. We enjoyed a delicious and wonderful time together. All during the preparation and cooking/baking (both my children contributed their food specialties - my son, his "Ambrosia Van Wynn"; my daughter, sweet potato pies and mac & cheese), my heart was warmed by the sounds and smells of what has always been our family tradition. I marked that: THANKFUL! The beautiful, thoughtful prayer over the food and family that my husband offered: THANKFUL!
After our meal, the kids and I joined our other family at the home of my sis-in-love. And the thanksgiving continued. I was blessed by the sharing of testimonies, praise and thanks given by each one present. We worshiped, singing the old songs of Zion, and some newer Gospels - extolling the love of our Lord and Savior. Overwhelmed by the words of my family members toward one another, I realized how important it is to speak love and life to one another at every opportunity, "while we yet live; while we can hear it." And I said so. Everyone was in agreement. The last time we gathered together was earlier this month as we said good-bye to a dear aunt; she had lived 90 years. But life is fleeting. As the Bible says, we are a mist that appears for little while and then vanishes; like a mere breath, our days like a passing shadow (paraphrase James 4:14 and Psalm 144:4).
My take-away from this experience, something I have known for some time, is I must seek out opportunities to uplift, encourage, and affirm whoever the Lord puts in my path. As Bruce wrote so well in his post
The Lord has orchestrated every person we meet and every situation we encounter. We should be thankful for the results of those meetings and situations.
As I think on these things, my prayer is for the Lord to use me and all of us who name the name of Christ, as conduits of His love, mercy and grace; that we use our time here wisely, and for His purpose, first and foremost.
When I think about the love toward me from the greatest Lover of all, I mark that: SO THANKFUL! Because without His loving us first, showing us the way, we wouldn't know how to truly love Him or one another.
Let's think about that every day - and as my husband said - spend time contemplating and articulating ALL we have to be thankful for. Thanksgiving, for believers, isn't merely the last Thursday in November.
Thursday, November 27, 2014
Did I Miss Anything?
I’ve been thinking if, in my thankfulness, I’ve forgotten anything. Of course I covered my health, my wife, my children, the food I eat, the job I have and all of the basics. But as I look back over my life, I could spend all day thanking the Lord for things I don’t normally think about, let alone be thankful for things that happened years ago; and things I admit I have taken for granted. The list is long and depending on which stage of my life, the list is quite diverse.
To give proper thanks I have decided to spend significant time each day throughout the day being thankful for a wide variety of things. If we begin connecting the dots that make up our lives, we can easily find things to be thankful for. The Lord has orchestrated every person we meet and every situation we encounter. We should be thankful for the results of those meetings and situations.
Anyone who has paid attention over the years will agree that the “Thanksgiving” holiday has been reduced to the official kick-off for the “Christmas” shopping season. As America continues on the path of separating itself from anything that even hints of spirituality, it is up to us as individuals to be thankful for all things big and small, for without those things, we would merely be a reflection of the world and all its ills - not the vessels of peace and love God wants us to be. Let us be thankful for that opportunity.
Bruce Edwards
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
"The Things I've Saved"
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| Eddie Brown (lft) and Joe Gilbert (rt) 1941-1966 |
I'm finally leavin, after all
One last word I don't wanna holler down the hall
Everybody leaves something when he goes away
After I'm gone, here's what I hope will stay:
Violets in springtime
Starry nights in fall
Sunlight on a summer's morning
Love to warm you when the snowflakes fall
The spark in the eyes of children
And secrets whispered by the sea
A countryside like a great cathedral
A place called home, a land forever free
This will be my last will and testament
being of sound body and mind
This will be my last will and testament
These are the things I've saved, to leave behind...
Yes,
This will be my last will and testament
being of sound body and mind
This will be my last will and testament
These are the things I choose to leave behind!
Joe Gilbert, Eddie Brown
© 1962
Featured on "There's a Meetin' Here Tonite, the Best of Joe & Eddie" CD
Sunday, November 16, 2014
Consequences - revisited
I'm bringing this one back because I am remiss. When this post was first published, back in 2014, I failed to mention that the very first person who gave me a wise, grown-up word on consequences was a friend of mine, S.C. I had trespassed against others and had indeed hurt them. I sought forgiveness. S.C. told me very plainly, that their treatment, opinion or actual disdain of/for me might just be part of my consequences - and I might not be forgiven. I needed that word. I am reminded of this counsel today, as I reflect on my actions of the past and how important it is to make sure, by God's power, there is no guile found in me, and no self-serving motives in my witness. Moving forward in the light of truth - 2016!
A Facebook friend of mine submitted a thoughtful post discussing the consequences we may face for past hurts we've caused others. She was specifically speaking of people who are "repeat offenders" - folks who seem to make a habit of being mean and abusive to friends and loved ones, yet expect the offended parties to always "turn the other cheek" and forgive them. The wisdom she imparted was spot on. Turning the other cheek doesn't mean "the slapper" gets to enjoy the same relationship as before, even though they've been forgiven. The relationship may just have to change - and the one who was "slapped" may choose to love and pray for "the slapper" from afar. That is a choice someone has the right to make, and a consequence that the forgiven must live with. And the writer was referring to Christians.
That post resonated with me. However, I'm flipping it a bit: when we've hurt someone, have tried to make amends, and they don't forgive us. That's a consequence as well. This consequence shouldn't happen among Christians, as we are to forgive one another - even if we were "the slapper." After we confess our sin to the Lord, repent of our wrongdoing (meaning turn away from it), go to the party we injured for forgiveness - there is nothing left to do. We must allow God to work whatever He will in that situation.
Prayer works. The Lord can move mightily in the hardest of hearts when we pray. It is the best weapon a believer has when we're faced with problems, tests and trials - including those of our own making. Being unforgiven by someone we've hurt is a fact, and a consequence that may not change.
But I thank God for Jesus! He forgave me before I sinned, when He died on the cross. I accept His forgiveness and only want to live in His will, sharing His message of love and salvation.
And the best consequence of all: a life lived for the Lord, is eternity with the Lord and all those saved in the Kingdom! Amen!
A Facebook friend of mine submitted a thoughtful post discussing the consequences we may face for past hurts we've caused others. She was specifically speaking of people who are "repeat offenders" - folks who seem to make a habit of being mean and abusive to friends and loved ones, yet expect the offended parties to always "turn the other cheek" and forgive them. The wisdom she imparted was spot on. Turning the other cheek doesn't mean "the slapper" gets to enjoy the same relationship as before, even though they've been forgiven. The relationship may just have to change - and the one who was "slapped" may choose to love and pray for "the slapper" from afar. That is a choice someone has the right to make, and a consequence that the forgiven must live with. And the writer was referring to Christians.
That post resonated with me. However, I'm flipping it a bit: when we've hurt someone, have tried to make amends, and they don't forgive us. That's a consequence as well. This consequence shouldn't happen among Christians, as we are to forgive one another - even if we were "the slapper." After we confess our sin to the Lord, repent of our wrongdoing (meaning turn away from it), go to the party we injured for forgiveness - there is nothing left to do. We must allow God to work whatever He will in that situation.
Prayer works. The Lord can move mightily in the hardest of hearts when we pray. It is the best weapon a believer has when we're faced with problems, tests and trials - including those of our own making. Being unforgiven by someone we've hurt is a fact, and a consequence that may not change.
But I thank God for Jesus! He forgave me before I sinned, when He died on the cross. I accept His forgiveness and only want to live in His will, sharing His message of love and salvation.
And the best consequence of all: a life lived for the Lord, is eternity with the Lord and all those saved in the Kingdom! Amen!
Thursday, October 30, 2014
Wednesday, October 29, 2014
Secrets
In my line of work, I've heard it all. And because of my work, I must keep things clients tell me confidential. As a friend, the same rule applies. As a friend, and as a counselor, I have listened to the stories (sometimes
both sides, separately), and promised to zip my lip, except to pray for
and with the individuals. I've kept my promises.
Now, I rarely give advice to personal friends, and will offer my opinion only when it is solicited. In my years of experience, I have found it is best to keep my advice to myself. (Amazing what can happen to folks after you've offered them some advice! WOW!) In my profession, I'm paid to offer options within the scope of the services I render and the resources I have available. When my clients get into their personal life issues, I listen and determine if a referral is needed for further exploration of the problem(s). In this case, a client's information may be shared in a meeting of that client's clinical team.
Some say that there are some secrets you should take to the grave; secrets that are just between you and God. I won't argue with that. Especially if you've confessed to the Lord and know you've been forgiven. But there are situations when keeping secrets does more harm than good, and I have advised folks to just tell it all, come clean and work things out, prayerfully.
I've taken my own advice, by the way. A long time ago, a very wise person advised me to confess, come clean, free myself (and others) from the bondage of the unspoken thing. And as a believer, I know that is what I am supposed to do, by the power and grace of God (Matthew 5:23-24).
Confessing, coming clean, reconciliation, restoration - I've been there, done that, recommend it. And I can report that it was and is worth the effort and the pain, all of which stimulates growth and gives all parties concerned a deeper insight into one another. It's a powerful, undeniable move of true love.
Secrets hold us hostage mentally, emotionally, spiritually and even physically. It's an unhealthy environment for families, and a huge contributor to the dysfunction in families.
Maybe releasing a secret will result in an unfavorable consequence. Then one must ask, "Would keeping someone in the dark about a serious matter be fair, responsible, or loving?"
Just a thought or two...
Now, I rarely give advice to personal friends, and will offer my opinion only when it is solicited. In my years of experience, I have found it is best to keep my advice to myself. (Amazing what can happen to folks after you've offered them some advice! WOW!) In my profession, I'm paid to offer options within the scope of the services I render and the resources I have available. When my clients get into their personal life issues, I listen and determine if a referral is needed for further exploration of the problem(s). In this case, a client's information may be shared in a meeting of that client's clinical team.
Some say that there are some secrets you should take to the grave; secrets that are just between you and God. I won't argue with that. Especially if you've confessed to the Lord and know you've been forgiven. But there are situations when keeping secrets does more harm than good, and I have advised folks to just tell it all, come clean and work things out, prayerfully.
I've taken my own advice, by the way. A long time ago, a very wise person advised me to confess, come clean, free myself (and others) from the bondage of the unspoken thing. And as a believer, I know that is what I am supposed to do, by the power and grace of God (Matthew 5:23-24).
Confessing, coming clean, reconciliation, restoration - I've been there, done that, recommend it. And I can report that it was and is worth the effort and the pain, all of which stimulates growth and gives all parties concerned a deeper insight into one another. It's a powerful, undeniable move of true love.
Secrets hold us hostage mentally, emotionally, spiritually and even physically. It's an unhealthy environment for families, and a huge contributor to the dysfunction in families.
Maybe releasing a secret will result in an unfavorable consequence. Then one must ask, "Would keeping someone in the dark about a serious matter be fair, responsible, or loving?"
Just a thought or two...
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! Five-Part Finale – Anecdotes and Bible Quotes
"Many waters cannot quench love" Song of Solomon 8:7 ESV
Quickly, we discover that the greatest threat to marriage is selfishness! There was a mother we know, who was trying to explain to her small son the benefits of unselfishness. She ended her little talk by saying, "We're in this world to help others." After thinking on this a bit, the boy asked, "Well then, what are the others here for?"
When two people put their own individual needs and wants first, they're on a collision course. Here are some examples of selfishness in marriage:
1. In-laws. It's a sign of selfishness and immaturity when you constantly harp about what your parents said, and how they did things. That is unfair to your spouse and it will hurt your relationship.
2. Pornography. The Psalmist writes, "I refuse to look at corrupting people and degrading things" (Psalm 101:3 TM). Pornography is as addictive as heroin, and untold numbers of marriages are shipwrecked by it. Not only does it leave individuals feeling ashamed, it can devastate a partner's self-worth.
3. Disagreements. Don't be like the woman who told her friend, "We've been married twenty years and never quarreled once. If a difference of opinion arises and I'm right, my husband gives in." Her friend asked, "And what if he is right?" Without hesitating she replied, "THAT never happened!" (Say what?!)
4. Prayerlessness. We've presented in other series, and research has shown that upwards of 90% of Christian couples don't read the Bible or pray together. Do you? If Christ is the most important thing in our lives, He should be the thing we most enjoy sharing.
When passion and physical beauty fade, our shared love for Christ will sustain us through the storms of life. So fight for your marriage!!
Blessings,
Bruce and Bridget
Monday, October 20, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! Five-Part Finale – Anecdotes and Bible Quotes
"Marriage should be honored...for God will judge the adulterer and...the immoral." Hebrews 13:4 NIV
A Sunday school teacher named Carla said, "My Sunday school class of first-graders was learning the Ten Commandments. When we got to 'Thou shalt not commit adultery,' I wondered if I'd have to explain it. Sure enough, a seven-year old girl raised her hand and asked, 'What does commit mean?'"
Truly, if we live by impulse instead of commitment, our marriages will suffer. The word "commitment" is best described in the traditional wedding vows. (Remember those?) "Will you have this woman (or man) to be your lawfully wedded wife (or husband)...to live together in God's holy ordinance of marriage...to be faithful...in good times and bad, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, remain faithful to her (or him)?" That's what we all said before God!
A hotel (which shall remain nameless) displayed a sign on its bulletin board for motorists to read that said: "HAVE YOUR NEXT AFFAIR WITH US!" That's not funny when you consider the ramifications! A prominent psychiatrist said, "I've counseled thousands of couples, and I've yet to meet my first happy adulterer."
The results are always the same: shame, fear, loss, loneliness and depression. When we violate our own integrity, it's hard to live in our own skin. Please don't be deceived by celebrities who hop from bed to bed...to bed. One of the best kept secrets of marital success isn't finding the right person, it's BECOMING the right person.
The Bible teaches that we are to care about the spiritual, emotional, material and sexual needs of our spouses. As we've urged in previous series - we urge today - start discussing these issues. And, if you find it difficult to talk about them, please get help. Your marriage is worth fighting for!
Sunday, October 19, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! Five-Part Finale - Anecdotes and Bible Quotes
"In the house of the wise are stores [savings]..." Proverbs 21:20 NIV
One of the most common issues that cause marriages to fail is: Finances. The number one reason for divorce these days is money. That's interesting, because we have more money today than at any time in the past. So what's the problem? In a nutshell: it's our lifestyle. The more we have, the more we want, and the more we're willing to go into debt to get it.
When times are good that philosophy works, but in the last fifty years we've lived through ten recessions. For example, folks who bought a home for $100,000, planning to sell it for $200,000 within a year or two, ended up losing everything because the housing market crashed. Imagine the stress that puts on a marriage! The strong endure; the weak don't. Many of us need to become reacquainted with a mostly forgotten word: "frugality". It means buying only what you can afford. The Bible says, "In the house of the wise are stores...but a foolish man devours all he has."
Financial experts now recommend keeping a minimum of six months' living expenses in a "rainy day" account. Over the years, our combined experience has provided much wisdom and taught us a fundamental truth: the secret of happiness and peace in marriage isn't spending all you've got, but saving and taking time to enjoy what you have!
Saturday, October 18, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! Five-Part Finale – Anecdotes and Bible Quotes
"They will be won over by observing your...lives." 1 Peter 3:1-2 NLT
A shared faith is the glue that will hold your marriage together in times of trouble. But when one spouse is an unbeliever, it can be difficult for the other. Concerning marriage, Jesus said, "What...God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" (Matthew 19:6). Notice the words, "What God hath joined together." Any relationship God puts together can go the distance. Speaking about a wife whose husband has died, Paul writes, "She is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord" (1Corinthians 7:39 NLT).
When your spouse doesn't share your faith, you can find yourselves tugging on opposite ends of the rope. Paul asks, "How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?" (See 1 Corinthians 6:15 NLY). An old country preacher put it bluntly: "Any time a child of God marries a child of the Devil, they're going to have trouble with their father-in-law!" Now, this doesn't mean one should love their unbelieving spouse less. Actually, it means you must love them more! Speaking of unbelieving spouses, Peter writes, "Even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your...lives."
There is "preventative medicine", and there is "corrective medicine." When Paul says not to marry an unbeliever, he's using preventative medicine. When Peter speaks about living with an unbeliever and winning them to Christ through your love and your lifestyle, he's using corrective medicine.
At the end of the day, there is only one thing that is guaranteed to work: "Love never fails" (1 Corinthians 14:8 NKJV). So, fight for your marriage!
A shared faith is the glue that will hold your marriage together in times of trouble. But when one spouse is an unbeliever, it can be difficult for the other. Concerning marriage, Jesus said, "What...God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" (Matthew 19:6). Notice the words, "What God hath joined together." Any relationship God puts together can go the distance. Speaking about a wife whose husband has died, Paul writes, "She is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord" (1Corinthians 7:39 NLT).
When your spouse doesn't share your faith, you can find yourselves tugging on opposite ends of the rope. Paul asks, "How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?" (See 1 Corinthians 6:15 NLY). An old country preacher put it bluntly: "Any time a child of God marries a child of the Devil, they're going to have trouble with their father-in-law!" Now, this doesn't mean one should love their unbelieving spouse less. Actually, it means you must love them more! Speaking of unbelieving spouses, Peter writes, "Even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your...lives."
There is "preventative medicine", and there is "corrective medicine." When Paul says not to marry an unbeliever, he's using preventative medicine. When Peter speaks about living with an unbeliever and winning them to Christ through your love and your lifestyle, he's using corrective medicine.
At the end of the day, there is only one thing that is guaranteed to work: "Love never fails" (1 Corinthians 14:8 NKJV). So, fight for your marriage!
Friday, October 17, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! Five-Part Finale – Anecdotes and Bible Quotes
“Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it.” Ps 127:1 NKJV
It’s easy to remember where and when you got married, but sometimes what escapes you is why. God created Eve because He knew Adam was lonely and needed a mate, just as all the creatures He’d made. So if the purpose of marriage is closeness, the enemy of marriage is distance. However, problems arise when you expect your spouse to meet your every need. Only God can do that.
A man asked his buddy, “Why haven’t you ever gotten married?” He replied, “Because I was looking for the ideal woman.” “And you never found her?” his friend asked. “Oh, sure, but it just so happened – she was looking for the ideal man!” Hello! The Bible says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loves the church and gave Himself for her” (Eph 5:25 NKJV).
Can a marriage ever be perfect? Not on this side of Heaven, but when two people make up their minds to give themselves fully to one another, they can come very close. In a survey of thousands of married couples, here are ten reasons why people said they were unhappy: 1. They didn’t think alike in many areas. 2. They had little insight into each other’s feelings. 3. They said hurtful things to one another. 4. They felt unloved. 5. They felt taken for granted. 6. They lacked someone to confide in. 7. Each spouse felt he or she was giving more than the other. 8. They rarely complimented each other. 9. They desire more affection. 10. They couldn’t talk to each other.
God performed the first marriage. We believe the best way to begin meaningful dialogue concerning your marriage is to talk to the One who created it!
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! We have an enemy, Part 2B
Satan actively attacked the first marriage (Gen. 3:1). He knew the way to get both the man and the woman to sin was to attack marriage. Satan did not appear to the woman as an ugly monster with a pitch fork. He appeared in the disguise of a beautiful creature with a very beautiful voice. He didn't try to overpower the woman. He appealed to her intellect. Satan disguised himself as an angel of light. Satan knows what people want and offers them what they desire. However, he will exact his price when the person is helplessly enslaved.
The devil has worked for centuries to set up a world system that says a
strong woman must never submit to a man. It says, "Submission means
getting walked on." God clearly commands, "Wives, be subject--be
submissive and adapt yourselves--to your own husbands" (Eph. 5:22,
Amplified). The truth is that when you submit to your husband, you will
not be weak, you will be strong, for whoever obeys the Lord is strong.
Through the deeds of those who do the will of the enemy, Satan has created a culture where respect between men and women is hard to find. The world says to respect someone only if you think he or she is worthy of it. Many times we as Christians go along with that standard. This causes friction in our marriages, and we begin to view our partners through the lens of society, and not through loving eyes with spiritual understanding and discernment. This kind of mindset is divisive; a recipe for disaster and dissolution of marriages today.
Because Satan wants to bring down our marriages, and in essence, our ministries, know that Christian marriage is subject to attacks of the unthinkable. Atrocities such as adultery, abandonment and various addictions are very destructive. If the devil can cause one of these things to happen, he will.
Then he'll lie - and make us believe things are so bad that we might as well give up. Don't believe it! We must hold our position and keep praying and doing what God tells us to do.
The Psalmist, David, says, "Through and with God we shall do valiantly, for He it is Who shall tread down our adversaries" (Psalm 108:13, Amplified).
We have an enemy, but he is already defeated. What we must do is walk together, in victory.
Through the deeds of those who do the will of the enemy, Satan has created a culture where respect between men and women is hard to find. The world says to respect someone only if you think he or she is worthy of it. Many times we as Christians go along with that standard. This causes friction in our marriages, and we begin to view our partners through the lens of society, and not through loving eyes with spiritual understanding and discernment. This kind of mindset is divisive; a recipe for disaster and dissolution of marriages today.
Because Satan wants to bring down our marriages, and in essence, our ministries, know that Christian marriage is subject to attacks of the unthinkable. Atrocities such as adultery, abandonment and various addictions are very destructive. If the devil can cause one of these things to happen, he will.
Then he'll lie - and make us believe things are so bad that we might as well give up. Don't believe it! We must hold our position and keep praying and doing what God tells us to do.
The Psalmist, David, says, "Through and with God we shall do valiantly, for He it is Who shall tread down our adversaries" (Psalm 108:13, Amplified).
We have an enemy, but he is already defeated. What we must do is walk together, in victory.
Monday, October 13, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! We have an enemy, Part 2A
The enemy of our souls is real. If you’re married, the target on your back just got bigger. If you’re in a Christian marriage, enlarge that target on your back again. Raising children? Up the collateral damage 1000%. The enemy we speak of is not interested in your marriage—not really. He’s interested in your children. That’s right. If Satan can take out your marriage, he’s got a great shot at your kids. And at the end of the day, it’s the next generation that’s going to pay the price. It’s the next generation that we must fight to protect.
We are living in an era where a covenant is not worth much. However, God sees things differently. He sees the covenant as it was designed to be seen: as eternal. Nothing in this life that’s worth doing is ever easy. Parenting is worth the struggle. Kids are worth it. Your marriage is worth it. No struggle = little value. Period.
“Marriage in our culture is under attack because it’s God-designed and everything designed by God is on the cultural chopping block under the guise of ‘tolerance.’ ( See more at: http://timewarpwife.com/fight-marriage-three-things-every-struggling-wife-needs-know/#sthash.UHbE78fa.dpuf )
And Pastors’ wives, Satan is really gunning for your marriage and your ministry! However, God wants you to take your rightful place--to live and move in the strong position in which He has placed you. From this strong position, you can see your enemy clearly, and you have the power, through Jesus Christ, to stand against and defeat anything he throws your way. You also are in a position to go on the offensive and advance the kingdom of God.
But you have a choice to make. You can sit back and let the devil have his way. Your marriage can get walked on; your ministry can be stomped on. Or you can say: "Not today, Satan. You're not taking me out. You're not taking my husband out. You're not taking our ministry out."
(See more at: http://ministrytodaymag.com/index.php/ministry-leadership/women-in-leadership/5924-fight-for-your-marriage#sthash.ovBF76fy.dpuf)
Husbands and wives: whether you’re engaged in “Pastoral ministry” or not, you are still ministers of the Gospel in your home, in the workplace, wherever you go. God has given us the tools to defeat the foe, and keep him from destroying our witness.
1. Pray the Word: God's Word is powerful, and He says it will not return to Him void but will accomplish that which He sent it to do ( Isa. 55:11). Move beyond the namby-pamby prayer, “Lord, help my husband/wife to have a good, safe, day. Amen.” Learn to pray the Word, using the Word, over your spouse and yourself. Wives, let the fierce anger of the Lord (Genesis 3:15) rise up in you, and see the mighty work of God’s transforming power. It works!
2. Walk in obedience: Another way to fight for your marriage is to walk in strict obedience to God’s ways for husbands and wives, EVEN when the world and your own feelings disagree. The enemy wants to take us out of our strong position. Satan doesn’t have the authority to take us out of our strong position, so he tries to get us to leave it ourselves. He is afraid of the power we have through Jesus Christ, and he knows the power married Christians possess to enlarge the Kingdom of God. So he tempts us to abandon God’s plan for marriage. How does he do it? – he works on our minds through deception, as always.
Join us tomorrow for some of the wily deceptions the enemy has been working behind the scenes for generations, yay, centuries, for such a time as this. You may have thoughts on some of the obvious attacks, and others that are more subtle and insidious. We welcome your comments, as we band together to FIGHT FOR OUR MARRIAGES AND OUR FAMILIES!
Sunday, October 12, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! - Marriage is not a fight, Part 1B
As promised, some "stick-like-glue" agreements:
- AGREE: that times will not always be easy. And agree that when you fight you'll make sure there's a beginning and an end. Think of disagreements in terms of a container. A container has limits and at times must be closed and reopened at another agreed-upon date. Don't let a container's contents spill over into all areas of your relationship. You will not always see eye to eye. Sometimes you must respectfully agree to disagree. But make sure you also spend time talking about things that you do view similarly. Avoid staying in a battle - and never keep score. Marriage is not a competition. It's a commitment.
3. ANTICIPATE: that things won't always go your way. Look for signs and triggers that indicate all is not well. Is your spouse withdrawn? Does he or she seem irritated by the fact that you're in the room? Do you continually interrupt when your spouse is speaking? Do you look for ways to debate or prove your mate wrong? Are you thinking of your response before your spouse finishes speaking?
Drop the hostage and project mentalities. A wife doesn't want to be held hostage by her husband. And a husband will never be a project that can be fixed. Expect that there will be conflicts, passion, disagreements, and decisions made - sometimes in the same night. Be willing to talk about them, and refuse to harbor them for days, weeks, or months.
Tony Rankin says, Couples like Derek and Kelli continue to learn each day that marriage is not a fight - but it's worth fighting for. Their relationship is a testimony of God's original plan for marriage: honest, open, sacrificial love as a way of life . Is yours?
As we move forward in this series, we welcome your comments and marital tips that work for you, so that all of us may be edified. It's all about FIGHTING FOR OUR MARRIAGES!
Saturday, October 11, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! - Marriage is not a fight, Part 1A
Kelli & Derek
Family Therapist and author, Tony Rankin, of LifeWay.com, shared the
following in an article titled "Your Marriage is Worth Fighting For -
Marriage is not a fight". It describes a common scene most of us have
experienced and poses some questions. We share it with you as we examine
ways Christian couples can fight for their marriages.
It's 11:16. Derek and Kelli are lying in bed. Not touching. Not speaking. Just staring at the ceiling fan as it hums and spins round and round. Their fight during dinner didn't end with a hug, a kiss, or "I'm sorry." Neither was willing to give in. Finally, after 10 minutes of suffocating silence, Derek exhales and whispers, "Kelli, I don't want to live like this. I can't live like this. What can I say to let you know I still love you?"
Tears begin to slide down Kelli's cheeks. She takes a shaky breath. "I wish I would have said something first. I really do love you, Derek, and I don't want to stay mad."
Slowly their hands meet beneath the sheet. They turn to face each other in the darkness and talk in hushed tones. Soon, the hall clock chimes midnight. They will talk more the next day. Everything isn't fixed. But there is hope.
Who would have spoken first in your marriage?
Marriage is supposed to last forever. There's all that "happily ever after" expectation. All that "til death do us part" sing-song. But then, there's all that harsh reality: selfishness, discontentment, disappointments, struggles, and, yes, loneliness - even when your spouse is right beside you. Harsh reality has killed many marriages. Harsh reality can leave almost any couple wrestling with the questions: Can this marriage be saved? Is our marriage really worth fighting for?
If your goal is to be true to your covenant to your spouse, forsaking all others, the answer is "Yes!" But you've got to get real. And getting real means you've got to stick together even when it's tough - especially when it's tough. A healthy reality check begins with some "stick-like-glue agreements" that a couple must embrace even before their wedding day - and every day thereafter.
Join us on Boaz Ministries tomorrow for Part 1B when we will present some of the stick-like-glue agreements. You may have some of your own. Feel free to share them with us!
Blessings,
Bruce & Bridget
It's 11:16. Derek and Kelli are lying in bed. Not touching. Not speaking. Just staring at the ceiling fan as it hums and spins round and round. Their fight during dinner didn't end with a hug, a kiss, or "I'm sorry." Neither was willing to give in. Finally, after 10 minutes of suffocating silence, Derek exhales and whispers, "Kelli, I don't want to live like this. I can't live like this. What can I say to let you know I still love you?"
Tears begin to slide down Kelli's cheeks. She takes a shaky breath. "I wish I would have said something first. I really do love you, Derek, and I don't want to stay mad."
Slowly their hands meet beneath the sheet. They turn to face each other in the darkness and talk in hushed tones. Soon, the hall clock chimes midnight. They will talk more the next day. Everything isn't fixed. But there is hope.
Who would have spoken first in your marriage?
Marriage is supposed to last forever. There's all that "happily ever after" expectation. All that "til death do us part" sing-song. But then, there's all that harsh reality: selfishness, discontentment, disappointments, struggles, and, yes, loneliness - even when your spouse is right beside you. Harsh reality has killed many marriages. Harsh reality can leave almost any couple wrestling with the questions: Can this marriage be saved? Is our marriage really worth fighting for?
If your goal is to be true to your covenant to your spouse, forsaking all others, the answer is "Yes!" But you've got to get real. And getting real means you've got to stick together even when it's tough - especially when it's tough. A healthy reality check begins with some "stick-like-glue agreements" that a couple must embrace even before their wedding day - and every day thereafter.
Join us on Boaz Ministries tomorrow for Part 1B when we will present some of the stick-like-glue agreements. You may have some of your own. Feel free to share them with us!
Blessings,
Bruce & Bridget
Tuesday, October 7, 2014
FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE!
Friends, and those who share their experiences with us, are great sources of information and tips on 'how to' enhance marriage. It's exciting to see/read real couples who are protective of and proactive concerning the preservation of their marriages!
Your marriage is your first ministry. Believe that. A healthy marriage isn't always easy, but it's well worth fighting for! And for the next several days, we will share some insights we've gleaned from testimonies, authors, and our own observations and experiences.
"...therefore, what God has joined together, man must never separate." Matthew 19: 6, pt 2 (ISV)
Thursday, October 2, 2014
While I Yet Loved You
for Pookie
Moments, like these, carry me back
Back to the day we sat next to each other on the plane
You looked at me, touched my hand
And told me this was the first time we'd ever sat together on a flight
We always had the children, in years gone by, sitting with us,
between us
But this trip, it was just the two of us
Traveling to a celebration
Flying 30,000 feet above the ground
600 miles per hour....
Feeling fine and free
Full of hope,
Blessed
I had no reason to believe that it would be our last flight together,
that our celebration would turn into mourning
And you would not return with me
Moments like these give me familiar chills,
with a brush of warmth upon my skin that sweetly soothes me
Because when the past was the present
You knew my heart
And took your last breath
While I yet loved you
Moments, like these, carry me back
Back to the day we sat next to each other on the plane
You looked at me, touched my hand
And told me this was the first time we'd ever sat together on a flight
We always had the children, in years gone by, sitting with us,
between us
But this trip, it was just the two of us
Traveling to a celebration
Flying 30,000 feet above the ground
600 miles per hour....
Feeling fine and free
Full of hope,
Blessed
I had no reason to believe that it would be our last flight together,
that our celebration would turn into mourning
And you would not return with me
Moments like these give me familiar chills,
with a brush of warmth upon my skin that sweetly soothes me
Because when the past was the present
You knew my heart
And took your last breath
While I yet loved you
©2014
Saturday, September 27, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 7
We made it! And by the grace of God, we feel great, have lost pounds, inches, and fluids due to water retention - that very subtle swelling of the ankles...GONE! We've gained a greater appreciation for the healing and rebuilding properties found in the natural vegetables and fruits God created. Processed foods are not on our shopping list, and from this day forward, we will add more and more green, immune system-strengthening foods.
Bruce says, "The seven day juicing cleanse was an experience I'll never forget and one that will serve me well for the duration. Everything said about the benefits of juicing turned out to be true. Well worth every stomach growl and trip to the bathroom! I have reached my weight loss goals, and know I now have the discipline to resist unhealthy eating in the future. There will be "crazy days" (I will allow myself a day to splurge on a treat or fast food item) - but juicing is now a permanent part of my life."
As for me, I'm so thrilled about my 13-pound weight loss, that I can't even think about giving myself a "crazy day." I've been edified and inspired, and my mind is clearer than when we started! Can't beat that!
All systems are "GO!" And we had a lot of fun doing it together. We highly recommend at least a 3-day juice fast, if you feel you can't do 7. It will change your life for the better!
Friday, September 26, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 6
We're both at the point where the "deprivation" we feel is almost our friend; and not a nagging reminder of this fast. Bruce said while he isn't "major hungry," he was feeling a bit weak. And we reasoned that there are a couple of key factors for this. One: he's been active each day, traveling into DC, keeping his normal pace - and two, he has not had his usual protein and fiber sources (or his sugar snacks!).
It's almost over, and Bruce has actually reached the lower end of his desired weight range! My weight loss goal is now within reach because I can see how to manage and balance my physical activity with dietary choices (continuing to be balanced and eating super foods), portion control, hydration and proper rest.
We're doing this for our personal enrichment, individually; for each other as partners in life, for our children and future grandchildren, and most of all, to the glory of God for an effective witness!
6 days done, our last day approaches!
Thursday, September 25, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 5
First of all, I've lost 10 pounds in 5 days! One of the key things I've been focusing on is a re-focusing of my dietary choices. Most people live to eat - but for maximum health, we need to flip it and "eat to live." And every now and then, the body needs to detox. I'm so thankful for the information.
We've decided to incorporate a 3-day cleansing fast once per month, along with making sure we have some juiced meals during the week.
Bruce says, "This seven day juicing cleanse is one of the more difficult challenges I've ever faced. With two more days to go I'm getting used to it and when I get on the scale I see that it's working. Keeping busy and going to bed early (what I used to do sometimes when I couldn't afford to eat) along with prayer for discipline and strength is carrying me across the finish line with a renewed commitment to continue to eat healthfully."
We're almost there - 5 down, 2 more to go!
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 4
Per Bruce: "While juicing is beneficial, it is not always good tasting.Part of the fun of juicing is trying different combinations of fruits and vegetables. When the combination is right it tastes great; when the combination is wrong, it's just wrong. Today was a wrong day. Thank God it's over."
Translation - Bruce prefers juice blends with a fruity mix! He didn't like lunch and dinner today. He enjoys "Morning Glory" for breakfast, and so do I. It's fruity with kale, a cucumber and ginger; so we guzzled that down this morning. We had a modified "Bruschetta Tang" for lunch - and I got a little creative, strayed from the path. However, I enjoyed my blend. For Dinner, we went red-ish. Beets, tomatoes, carrots... again, my creation. I appreciated the smoothness and it tasted "wholesome."
I continue to lose weight - down 7 pounds since Sunday! Bruce has dropped 5, to his happy surprise! Eat-fests like the All Staff luncheon at my job today don't faze me at all. And tomorrow, my Company is hosting a Job and Training Fair - and there will be catered treats for the Vendors. I'll be sipping on my juice bottle, as I did today, and keep it moving!
All in all, we're having fun with this cleansing fast. Now I know which ingredients are more flavorful and agreeable to my husband. But I appreciate that he went ahead and drank his juice, because he knew it was good for him!
Four down, three to go!
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 3
We are literally putting this day to bed! Both of us had challenges today, it's almost a blur.
For breakfast we tried a recipe called "Jolt Juice": 2 apples, 1 orange, 1 cucumber, 1/4 peeled lemon, 4 kale leaves. Outstanding flavor! We revisited "Bruschetta Tang" for lunch; and for dinner, we enjoyed "Green Machine" - 4 kale leaves, 2 apples, 2 cups of spinach, 1/2 cucumber, 2 celery stalks, 1 carrot and 1" of ginger. Again - amazing flavor.
I experienced some pangs of hunger between breakfast and lunch so I sipped on my "Bruschetta Tang", slowly. That helped, then I loaded up on water for the rest of the day (which ended two hours ago).
The greatest part of this for me. is the fact that I am losing actual weight! In three days, I've lost 5 pounds! And my energy level has increased!
Bruce reports: "My will power was tested today as several lunchtime food trucks were in my face all day. I got through the day by focusing on the results I'm achieving and praying for strength. Still not crazy hungry, but hungry. This is hard but I'll get through."
Focusing on the results is excellent motivation. Ain't no stopping us now! We have 3 days under our belts (no pun intended), and 4 days to go!
Thank you for your prayers. Don't stop!
Monday, September 22, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 2
Well,
the second day is a wrap. And we basically repeated the breakfast
("Morning Glory") and Dinner ("Sunset Passion") recipes, with an orange
added to each. It was delish! Lunch ("Mean Green") consisted of 1
apple, 1 cucumber, 4 celery stalks, 5 kale leaves, 1 inch of ginger and 1/4 peeled lemon. YUM!
Because I have fasted before- taking only water, the discipline it takes is not foreign to me, and I'm handling it pretty well.. This experience is particularly agreeable because it is so tasty.
Bruce and I check in on each other throughout the day, and it truly makes a difference when you have a buddy. At one point during his "intentionally busy day" he sent me an email to share on Boaz:
"It appears that my body now knows something is going on that is different from the norm. Hunger aches along with stomach growling are the order of the day. Brotha HONGRY!"
He also told me that he knows the toxins are flushing from his body - and that's a good thing!
Keep praying! Two down, five to go!
Because I have fasted before- taking only water, the discipline it takes is not foreign to me, and I'm handling it pretty well.. This experience is particularly agreeable because it is so tasty.
Bruce and I check in on each other throughout the day, and it truly makes a difference when you have a buddy. At one point during his "intentionally busy day" he sent me an email to share on Boaz:
"It appears that my body now knows something is going on that is different from the norm. Hunger aches along with stomach growling are the order of the day. Brotha HONGRY!"
He also told me that he knows the toxins are flushing from his body - and that's a good thing!
Keep praying! Two down, five to go!
Sunday, September 21, 2014
Just on Juice - Day 1
 |
We completed our first day of just juicing! Breakfast ("Morning
Glory"), consisted of 2 apples, 1 cucumber, 1 cup of blueberries, 2 cups
of grapes, 2 cups of spinach, and a pinch of ginger. Lunch ("Bruschetta
Tang"), was 2 tomatoes, 2 peeled garlic cloves, a bunch of Basil, and
1/4 peeled lemon. Finally, Dinner ("Sunset Passion") was a mellow blend
of 1 sliced beet, 1 apple, 1 cucumber, 1 carrot, 2 cups of spinach, 1/4 peeled lemon and 1/4 peeled lime.
The 7-day plan we are following allows for mixing it up and substituting. Because we're new to this, we are taking it easy and going by the recipes - although I have switched out kale for spinach so far. And of course, drinking lots of water after a juice meal is essential.
Bruce said: "The hardest part about day one was thinking that I have six more days to go. Keeping busy was key to getting through the day and it looks like I'll get a lot of things done over the next six days. The juice tastes better than I thought it would."
As for me - today was a success. I was able to sing in a choir, with vigor, and was not tempted in the least to partake of the sumptuous fellowship feast that followed the service. I feel energetic and excited to see what tomorrow brings.
We do recommend prepping and bagging your fruits and veggies the night before. I'll juice what I plan to take to work in the morning - and pour it into my 32 oz "sippy cup."
One down, six to go!
The 7-day plan we are following allows for mixing it up and substituting. Because we're new to this, we are taking it easy and going by the recipes - although I have switched out kale for spinach so far. And of course, drinking lots of water after a juice meal is essential.
Bruce said: "The hardest part about day one was thinking that I have six more days to go. Keeping busy was key to getting through the day and it looks like I'll get a lot of things done over the next six days. The juice tastes better than I thought it would."
As for me - today was a success. I was able to sing in a choir, with vigor, and was not tempted in the least to partake of the sumptuous fellowship feast that followed the service. I feel energetic and excited to see what tomorrow brings.
We do recommend prepping and bagging your fruits and veggies the night before. I'll juice what I plan to take to work in the morning - and pour it into my 32 oz "sippy cup."
One down, six to go!
Saturday, September 20, 2014
"Doing It Together" - Just on Juice!
Boaz Ministries
Tomorrow, Bridget and I begin another exercise in “Doing it Together” by way of a “Seven Day Fast/Cleanse."
This will be very hard to do as we both like to eat! But by doing it together we can encourage each other, keep an eye on each other, and pray for each other.
We will be submitting daily progress reports each of the seven days we are fasting/cleansing.
Below is the shopping list we found on www.justonjuice.com. We'll be following the suggested menu on the website, and welcome you to join us, or at least think about planning to do a juicing fast in the near future. This was something we'd been preparing to do for some time. We look forward to experiencing the health benefits of a lifestyle of juicing on a regular basis.
We thought a picture of some of the veggies and fruit we purchased for the fast would be helpful to readers. And we solicit your prayers... It's on!!
Shopping List of 7 Day Juice Fast Plan
12-15 Granny Smith Apples x 2
16 – 20 Cucumbers
1 Bag of Carrots
1 Bag of Oranges
6-12 Tomatoes
7 Beets
1 Garlic
1 Bag of Basil Large
4 Cups of Blueberries
A Bag of Grapes
3 Bags of Celery
5 Big Bags of Spinach or 8-12 Bundles of Kale
A Ginger Root
7 Lemons
2 Limes
Tomorrow, Bridget and I begin another exercise in “Doing it Together” by way of a “Seven Day Fast/Cleanse."
This will be very hard to do as we both like to eat! But by doing it together we can encourage each other, keep an eye on each other, and pray for each other.
We will be submitting daily progress reports each of the seven days we are fasting/cleansing.
Below is the shopping list we found on www.justonjuice.com. We'll be following the suggested menu on the website, and welcome you to join us, or at least think about planning to do a juicing fast in the near future. This was something we'd been preparing to do for some time. We look forward to experiencing the health benefits of a lifestyle of juicing on a regular basis.
We thought a picture of some of the veggies and fruit we purchased for the fast would be helpful to readers. And we solicit your prayers... It's on!!
Shopping List of 7 Day Juice Fast Plan
12-15 Granny Smith Apples x 2
16 – 20 Cucumbers
1 Bag of Carrots
1 Bag of Oranges
6-12 Tomatoes
7 Beets
1 Garlic
1 Bag of Basil Large
4 Cups of Blueberries
A Bag of Grapes
3 Bags of Celery
5 Big Bags of Spinach or 8-12 Bundles of Kale
A Ginger Root
7 Lemons
2 Limes
Friday, September 19, 2014
More Prayer, More Power! "Her Sexuality"
"Lord, help me to always treat my wife with respect and honor and never say anything that would demean her, even in jest. Help me to be considerate of her when she is exhausted or not feeling well. But I also pray that she would understand my sexual needs and be considerate of those as well.
Only You can help us find that balance. Make our sexual relationship
fulfilling, enjoyable, freeing, and refreshing for both of us. May our
intimacy bond the two of us together and connect our hearts and emotions
as well as our bodies. Help us to freely communicate our needs and
desires to one another.
Text:
'The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. and likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 1 Corinthians 7:4'"
Text:
'The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. and likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 1 Corinthians 7:4'"
Thursday, September 18, 2014
More Prayer, More Power! "His Health"
"Lord, I pray for Your healing touch on my husband. May every part of his body function the way You designed it to.
Wherever there is anything out of balance, set it in perfect working order. Heal him of any disease, illness, injury, infirmity, or weakness.
Strengthen his body to successfully endure his workload, and when he sleeps may he wake up completely rested, rejuvenated and refreshed.
I pray that he will have the desire to take care of his body, to eat the kind of food that brings health, to get regular exercise, and avoid anything that would be harmful to him. Help him to understand that his body is Your temple and he should care for it as such (1 Corinthians 3:16).
Text:
'I have heard your prayer, I have seen your tears; surely I will heal you. 2 Kings 20:5'"
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
More Prayer, More Power! "His Finances"
"Lord, I commit our finances to You. Be in charge of them and use them for Your purposes. May my husband and I be good stewards of all that You give us and walk in total agreement as to how it is to be disbursed. I pray that we will learn to live free of burdensome debt.
Where we have not been wise, bring restoration and give us guidance. Show me how I can help increase our finances and not decrease them unwisely. Help us to remember that all we have belongs to You and to be grateful for it.
Text:
'Do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind. For all these things the nations of the world seek after, and your Father knows that you need these things. But seek first the kingdom of God, and all these shall be added to you. Luke 12:29-31'"
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