Post Thanksgiving Day Thoughts

I was gathering my thoughts about thankfulness when Bruce gave me his post to share on our ministry page yesterday (also shared here). This is one of those things that blesses my heart - reading his thoughts, his testimony.

For Thanksgiving, I prepared my first complete meal since moving to the DC area in 2012, at my house, for my two younger adult children and my husband. We enjoyed a delicious and wonderful time together. All during the preparation and cooking/baking (both my children contributed their food specialties - my son, his "Ambrosia Van Wynn"; my daughter, sweet potato pies and mac & cheese), my heart was warmed by the sounds and smells of what has always been our family tradition. I marked that: THANKFUL! The beautiful, thoughtful prayer over the food and family that my husband offered: THANKFUL!

After our meal, the kids and I joined our other family at the home of my sis-in-love. And the thanksgiving continued. I was blessed by the sharing of testimonies, praise and thanks given by each one present. We worshiped, singing the old songs of Zion, and some newer Gospels - extolling the love of our Lord and Savior. Overwhelmed by the words of my family members toward one another, I realized how important it is to speak love and life to one another at every opportunity, "while we yet live; while we can hear it." And I said so. Everyone was in agreement. The last time we gathered together was earlier this month as we said good-bye to a dear aunt; she had lived 90 years. But life is fleeting.  As the Bible says, we are a mist that appears for little while and then vanishes; like a mere breath, our days like a passing shadow (paraphrase James 4:14 and Psalm 144:4).

My take-away from this experience, something I have known for some time, is I must seek out opportunities to uplift, encourage, and affirm whoever the Lord puts in my path. As Bruce wrote so well in his post 

The Lord has orchestrated every person we meet and every situation we encounter. We should be thankful for the results of those meetings and situations.

As I think on these things, my prayer is for the Lord to use me and all of us who name the name of Christ, as conduits of His love, mercy and grace; that we use our time here wisely, and for His purpose, first and foremost. 

When I think about the love toward me from the greatest Lover of all, I mark that: SO THANKFUL! Because without His loving us first, showing us the way, we wouldn't know how to truly love Him or one another.

Let's think about that every day - and as my husband said - spend time contemplating and articulating ALL we have to be thankful for. Thanksgiving, for believers, isn't merely the last Thursday in November.

Did I Miss Anything?

Boaz Ministries


I’ve been thinking if, in my thankfulness, I’ve forgotten anything. Of course I covered my health, my wife, my children, the food I eat, the job I have and all of the basics. But as I look back over my life, I could spend all day thanking the Lord for things I don’t normally think about, let alone be thankful for things that happened years ago; and things I admit I have taken for granted. The list is long and depending on which stage of my life, the list is quite diverse.

To give proper thanks I have decided to spend significant time each day throughout the day being thankful for a wide variety of things. If we begin connecting the dots that make up our lives, we can easily find things to be thankful for. The Lord has orchestrated every person we meet and every situation we encounter. We should be thankful for the results of those meetings and situations.

Anyone who has paid attention over the years will agree that the “Thanksgiving” holiday has been reduced to the official kick-off for the “Christmas” shopping season. As America continues on the path of separating itself from anything that even hints of spirituality, it is up to us as individuals to be thankful for all things big and small, for without those things, we would merely be a reflection of the world and all its ills - not the vessels of peace and love God wants us to be. Let us be thankful for that opportunity.

Bruce Edwards

"The Things I've Saved"

Eddie Brown (lft) and Joe Gilbert (rt) 1941-1966

 ..is the title of a  beloved song from my childhood. I was raised on music; all kinds of music, thanks to my musically gifted parents. This beautiful melody has been playing in my mind over the past few days. It was sung by a male Gospel/Folk duo known as Joe and Eddie in the 60s, and had been lost to me for decades (Thank you, Youtube!). On this particular song, (the late) Joe Gilbert sings alone, for the first and only time before his tragic death in a car accident. He's accompanied by an acoustic guitar, and it is lovely, I tell you! I'm sharing the lyrics because as a young girl, 6 and 7 years of age, I was captivated by them! The words held so much wonder for me back then. Now that I am older, these simple words ring so clear and true. And they express exactly how I feel today.

I'm finally leavin, after all

One last word I don't wanna holler down the hall

Everybody leaves something when he goes away

 After I'm gone, here's what I hope will stay:

Violets in springtime

Starry nights in fall

 Sunlight on a summer's morning

Love to warm you when the snowflakes fall

The spark in the eyes of children

And secrets whispered by the sea

A countryside like a great cathedral

A place called home, a land forever free

This will be my last will and testament

being of sound body and mind

This will be my last will and testament

These are the things I've saved, to leave behind...

Yes, 

This will be my last will and testament

being of sound body and mind

This will be my last will and testament

These are the things I choose to leave behind!

Joe Gilbert, Eddie Brown

© 1962

Featured on "There's a Meetin' Here Tonite, the Best of Joe & Eddie" CD

Consequences - revisited

I'm bringing this one back because I am remiss. When this post was first published, back in 2014, I failed to mention that the very first person who gave me a wise, grown-up word on consequences was a friend of mine, S.C.  I had trespassed against others and had indeed hurt them. I sought forgiveness. S.C. told me very plainly, that their treatment, opinion or actual disdain of/for me might just be part of my consequences - and I might not be forgiven.  I needed that word.  I am reminded of this counsel today, as I reflect on my actions of the past and how important it is to make sure, by God's power, there is no guile found in me, and no self-serving motives in my witness. Moving forward in the light of truth - 2016!

A Facebook friend of mine submitted a thoughtful post discussing the consequences we may face for past hurts we've caused others. She was specifically speaking of people who are "repeat offenders" - folks who seem to make a habit of being mean and abusive to friends and loved ones, yet expect the offended parties to always "turn the other cheek" and forgive them. The wisdom she imparted was spot on. Turning the other cheek doesn't mean "the slapper" gets to enjoy the same relationship as before, even though they've been forgiven. The relationship may just have to change - and the one who was "slapped" may choose to love and pray for "the slapper" from afar.  That is a choice someone has the right to make, and a consequence that the forgiven must live with. And the writer was referring to Christians.

That post resonated with me. However, I'm flipping it a bit: when we've hurt someone, have tried to make amends, and they don't forgive us. That's a consequence as well. This consequence shouldn't happen among Christians, as we are to forgive one another -  even if we were "the slapper." After we confess our sin to the Lord, repent of our wrongdoing (meaning turn away from it), go to the party we injured for forgiveness - there is nothing left to do. We must allow God to work whatever He will in that situation.

Prayer works. The Lord can move mightily in the hardest of hearts when we pray. It is the best weapon a believer has when we're faced with problems, tests and trials - including those of our own making. Being unforgiven by someone we've hurt is a fact, and a consequence that may not change.

But I thank God for Jesus! He forgave me before I sinned, when He died on the cross. I accept His forgiveness and only want to live in His will, sharing His message of love and salvation.

And the best consequence of all: a life lived for the Lord, is eternity with the Lord and all those saved in the Kingdom! Amen!

The Next Level - I had to share

The Ministry of Marriage - 3 Marriages

Secrets

In my line of work, I've heard it all. And because of my work, I must keep things clients tell me confidential. As a friend, the same rule applies. As a friend, and as a counselor, I have listened to the stories (sometimes both sides, separately), and promised to zip my lip, except to pray for and with the individuals. I've kept my promises.

Now, I rarely give advice to personal friends, and will offer my opinion only when it is solicited. In my years of experience, I have found it is best to keep my advice to myself. (Amazing what can happen to folks after you've offered them some advice! WOW!) In my profession, I'm paid to offer options within the scope of the services I render and the resources I have available. When my clients get into their personal life issues, I listen and determine if a referral is needed for further exploration of the problem(s). In this case, a client's information may be shared in a meeting of that client's clinical team.

Some say that there are some secrets you should take to the grave; secrets that are just between you and God. I won't argue with that. Especially if you've confessed to the Lord and know you've been forgiven. But there are situations when keeping secrets does more harm than good, and I have advised folks to just tell it all, come clean and work things out, prayerfully.


I've taken my own advice, by the way. A long time ago, a very wise person advised me to confess, come clean, free myself (and others) from the bondage of the unspoken thing. And as a believer, I know that is what I am supposed to do, by the power and grace of God (Matthew 5:23-24).

Confessing, coming clean, reconciliation, restoration - I've been there, done that, recommend it. And I can report that it was and is worth the effort and the pain, all of which stimulates growth and gives all parties concerned a deeper insight into one another. It's a powerful, undeniable move of true love.

Secrets hold us hostage mentally, emotionally, spiritually and even physically. It's an unhealthy environment for families, and a huge contributor to the dysfunction in families.

Maybe releasing a secret will result in an unfavorable consequence. Then one must ask, "Would keeping someone in the dark about a serious matter be fair, responsible, or loving?"

Just a thought or two...

FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE! Five-Part Finale – Anecdotes and Bible Quotes

Boaz Ministries

"Many waters cannot quench love" Song of Solomon 8:7 ESV

Quickly, we discover that the greatest threat to marriage is selfishness! There was a mother we know, who was trying to explain to her small son the benefits of unselfishness. She ended her little talk by saying, "We're in this world to help others." After thinking on this a bit, the boy asked, "Well then, what are the others here for?"

When two people put their own individual needs and wants first, they're on a collision course. Here are some examples of selfishness in marriage:

1. In-laws. It's a sign of selfishness and immaturity when you constantly harp about what your parents said, and how they did things. That is unfair to your spouse and it will hurt your relationship.
2. Pornography. The Psalmist writes, "I refuse to look at corrupting people and degrading things" (Psalm 101:3 TM). Pornography is as addictive as heroin, and untold numbers of marriages are shipwrecked by it. Not only does it leave individuals feeling ashamed, it can devastate a partner's self-worth.
3. Disagreements. Don't be like the woman who told her friend, "We've been married twenty years and never quarreled once. If a difference of opinion arises and I'm right, my husband gives in." Her friend asked, "And what if he is right?" Without hesitating she replied, "THAT never happened!" (Say what?!)
4. Prayerlessness. We've presented in other series, and research has shown that upwards of 90% of Christian couples don't read the Bible or pray together. Do you? If Christ is the most important thing in our lives, He should be the thing we most enjoy sharing.

When passion and physical beauty fade, our shared love for Christ will sustain us through the storms of life. So fight for your marriage!!

Blessings,

Bruce and Bridget