Friday, March 4, 2016

Persistent Complex Bereavement Disorder

Yes. That was my diagnosis in 2015, after the unexpected death of my father earlier that year. And as a person who has worked in mental health as a Mental Health Rehabilitation Specialist, I kind of went with that. I also needed to address my grief from the unexpected death of my late husband, who died in 2010.

A well meaning, older lady friend of mine, a widow for many years, expressed surprise when I said, in our conversation about our dearly departed husbands, that there isn't a day that goes by that I do not think of him in some way. She said, "Well, you've married again, so, I didn't think you would have those feelings anymore..." Being married again in no way erases someone with whom you grew up for 35 years and raised a family. I also have three wonderful reminders in the persons of our children, and they indeed bring me joy with the memories!

When my father passed away last January, and then my dear uncle, in February - I knew I needed some professional help. So I went in to see a therapist. It was cleansing to talk to someone and hear feedback from an impartial person. In order to justify my sessions, however, the closest diagnosis she could find in her DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition -the therapists' bible), was Persistent Complex Bereavement Disorder. I studied all of the symptoms, and most of them are so drastically unrelated to what I was going through, I just smiled. But 2015 was just getting started.

More friends and family members died, one right after the other; then the mass shootings in our country. The mass killings, kidnappings, and be-headings were going on around the world. Death and destruction were happening everywhere, every day, every week, every month! All of the mayhem that was coming at a rapid-fire pace drove me into prayer mode on a constant basis!  There are moments when I find I have tears in my eyes - for no apparent reason. And now I recognize it is the preponderance of horrifying news, and so many people suffering, that causes me to weep.

My writing, my husband, Bruce, my family, my dearest friends, my prayer partners and Bible study fellowship - these are the gifts and blessings God has given me here on earth to sustain me. I no longer go to see the nice lady therapist. I know how to cope, and part of my coping mechanism is to share and encourage others.

The daily prayer series - which will continue every day for the rest of this year (by God's grace) - is being presented by Boaz Ministries to help us remember that we are not alone in our daily struggles with everyday life. We CAN pray without ceasing. Staying connected to the Lord throughout the day will raise our moods and calm our attitudes, and at the same time, draw us ever closer to Him. THAT'S the healthy mindset that leads to transformation, deliverance and victory!

Finally, I share two Bible texts - and as always, please read them in context.  Blessings and thanks for reading.


I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16.33

Rejoice always,  pray without ceasing,  in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18




 

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