68 Powerful Days

We had no inkling of the brief time we had left. At least, I didn't. After he'd been in rehabilitation for nearly a month after the accident, Lamont, my late husband, and I were looking forward to two major life events. Our second daughter was graduating from college in May, and our older daughter, our first child, was getting married in July that summer. It was to be a time of continuous celebrations, because that summer would mark the end of our son's first year in college. And he had had a very successful experience away from home.

The accident happened on the first of March. And Lamont spent the entire month in the hospital and in rehabilitation. It had been a car accident; he'd been hit by a drunk driver while we were walking together on a country road. His survival and minor injuries were nothing short of a miracle.God surely answered my cry on that night. The prognosis for complete recovery was excellent - mending bones, and out-patient physical therapy. I remember him being a model patient because he had so much to look forward to.

I've written elsewhere in this blog of the details of his last day, and nothing is more clear to me when I reflect upon those hours. However it occurs to me that he knew his time was short. There were so many clues he gave me in conversation, and when we prayed, or when I would find him in his wheelchair with his Bible on his lap, staring out of the great window of our living room. He was constantly talking to God - "wrestling" with Him, as he had told one of his sisters. And she believes, as I do, that God spoke to him concerning his life, and his imminent death.

He died of a pulmonary embolism - a blood clot. We had traveled from California to Alabama - with his doctors' permission - to attend the graduation. We both missed Commencement, because he was rushed to the hospital just hours before it was to begin. But what we didn't miss were the very important things that have served to keep me strong, keep our children strong in the aftermath.

God gave me 68 days to grow closer to Him as I cared for my husband. I had stood out on that road that night on the first day in March - as my husband lay underneath the SUV, with my face and fists raised to the sky and demanded that God spare his life. He granted my request. And then God allowed us to journey for the last time to the place where my husband and I first met - our Alma Mater - to join all of our loved ones in celebration of our daughter's graduation. It had been an incredible time, especially our last day.

In all, we had 68 incredible days together in our 31 years of marriage, of our 35 years of knowing each other. So much was experienced, so much was shared - so much was learned; I cherish it all. I thank God for ordering my life, our life, in such a powerful way. I thank God for His omniscience - for He knew the work that was begun in the life that has now ended, would continue.

I can count the days, weeks, months and years as markers in my former life with Lamont, now that he is gone. Everything can now be measured in increments of the time that we had left. That's the way it is after someone has died. We can look back 10 years before that final date and reflect on what we couldn't have known at that time - that we only had 10 years left, etc. We can think of what was taking place 20 years before the final date and how we misused or mishandled opportunities, situations.... on and on.

This is what fuels my ministry to couples. The unknown is just a "picosecond" ahead of us. We might have a plan, but make no mistake, plans are known to change in the twinkling of an eye. Since we have no idea how many days we have left on this earth, I encourage us to live powerful, intentional, spiritual lives every moment we have breath. Be thankful, cheerful, helpful; live with grace and graciousness. Be at peace, let go of petty issues that weigh down the heart and cloud the mind. Let us change our negativity into positive self-talk, and we will find we will attract more positivity into our lives.

Love fiercely, completely, freely, and genuinely. And watch the Lord richly bless you and your house! I can guarantee you will have no regrets. Ask me how I know!